6 Ways to Use a Wand Vibrator

Wand vibrators are a fan favorite, and for good reason! 

Most wand vibrators have wide heads to provide stimulation over a broad area. They’re larger than your average vibe, so they can have big, powerful motors. Wand handles provide longer reach and easier maneuverability. Some wands even have bonus attachments to change up the experience. 

But once you’ve got a wand in hand… what can you use it for? The short answer is for coming – but for a longer answer:


For quick, easy orgasms. 

The strong, deeply rumbly vibrations of wands like the Doxy, Viben Sultry, or Fun Factory Vim reverberate deeply to stimulate the internal portions of the clitoris. And on the penis? If you can handle the intensity, wand vibes can be used against the frenulum, balls, or taint – and unlike most strokers, you can use a wand on a non-erect penis!

The size and sheer power of wands help take a lot of the effort out of orgasming. While every body is different (and some folks may prefer gentler stimulation or find other methods more orgasmic), those of us who enjoy wands often reach for them when we’re tired or busy. It’s as easy as pressing a button and snuggling the wand head into place. 


While going down.

Giving head is its own joy, but sometimes we’re in the mood to get some while we give some! Wands can be ideal for masturbating with a mouthful because they don’t require much attention beyond holding them in place – and depending on your position, you might not even have to do that. Even better, strong vibrations are sure to pull a few moans out of you, and your partner will appreciate the vibration of your voice. 

The Satisfyer Wand-er even has the option to change intensity through an app, so you can hand the controls over to your partner(s) for an even more mutual exchange. 


To share with partner(s). 

Many sex toys are designed with only one kind of genitals in mind, so if you and your partner(s) don’t ‘match up,’ you probably have to cart a handful of options to bed. Not necessarily so with wands!

“The real delight of wands is their versatility. Wands are the great equalizers of sex toys: they can be used on any body type. They’re not to everyone’s taste – not everyone enjoys strong, broadly-applied vibrations – but they have the potential to please most participants,” I wrote in Wand Vibrators are For Everybody. “Partnered sex with wands can be amazing. Couples who like tribbing or frottage, for example, can slide in a wand to mutual benefit.”

In fact, if I want to get off by scissoring, I grab a seamless waterproof wand first.


For forced orgasms.

“Forced orgasms are orgasms that you (consensually) coax forth through sheer power – whether you’re ready or not!” I explain in Ouch, I Like It. They’re a great way to explore dominance and submission with a partner – you’re literally controlling the pace of their pleasure! What better way to show them who’s boss in bed? “Wand vibrators like the Doxy, the “Hitachi” Magic Wand, and the Viben are a fan favorite for forced orgasms because of their large heads (which are too big to wriggle away from) and incredibly strong vibrations.” 


To race your partner(s). 

I probably don’t have to explain this to partners who game, play sports, or exercise together – but competition can be a serious turn on. If winning the right to skip washing the dishes for a week by trouncing your lover in Smash Brothers gets you going, competitive masturbation is sure to be a winner. 

Whether the contest is who can come first, who can hold off the longest, or who can come the most, wand vibrators make for great equalizers. For a hands-free competition (maybe to keep your hands loose for some sexy but unsportsmanlike sabotage) you and your opponent(s) can stick your wands of choice into a sex toy mount like the Liberator Wanda or Axis.  


For doggy style. 

From 10 Ways to Spice Up Doggy Style: “Doggy style is great for a number of things, but it can be difficult to reliably reach your genitals when you’re on your hands and knees. Especially if you have short arms, a prominent belly, etc. Sex toys can help us reach further than our fingers – but sex toys with handles can do even better.”

In my experience, wands with curved handles – like the BMS PalmPower Extreme or the O Wand Massager – usually work best for doggy style sex. They’re easier to angle up and into place. If you have a penis and prefer a more enveloped sensation from your toys, the “Man” Wand Xtreme has a stroker attachment.

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Betty Butch (they/she) is a queer sex and relationships writer. By blogging about their experiences as a fat, trans, autistic person, they hope to help change the narrative of who has sex and what sex "should" be. Follow them on Twitter and Instagram.

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