Getting To Know Yourself Through Self-Pleasure

For some, masturbation is a shameful act that they don’t feel comfortable embracing. For others, self-pleasure might be viewed as a means to an end instead of an explorative experience. No matter what your relationship is with masturbation, self-pleasure is a beautiful experience that may leave you with even more knowledge about yourself than anticipated.

Shove Away the Shame

It’s so important to understand that there’s nothing shameful about masturbation. Sex and masturbation are GOOD! Whether in a relationship or single, self-pleasure is a gift to give yourself. It’s a private time to explore and discover more about your preferences and desires.

This is not a replacement for your partner and it’s important to relay that if needed. What you enjoy can translate to your desires and voice in the bedroom. Much like you might put on a face mask or relax with a good book, self-pleasure can become a fantastic way to unwind and recharge. There is nothing shameful about taking care of your needs!

Get Comfortable With Yourself

If you aren’t in a comfortable setting for masturbation it can be difficult to get in the mood. When you’re in your head and hoping to relax, it helps to set the scene and make the space around you more welcoming.

Light a candle or two and dim the lights. Make sure the space around you is picked up so you can stretch out and enjoy without the distraction of chores. If music helps turn off your mind, play something that gets you in the mood!

If it has been a while or you’re just starting the journey of self-pleasure, take time to explore yourself. Investigate with your hands and learn slowly what feels good and what you would rather avoid before bringing toys into the equation. If you are not familiar with your anatomy, try adding a mirror to look at yourself as you play. This adds another level of self-discovery as you learn all about yourself and your pleasure. Not interested in watching it? No problem! It’s all about what feels best for YOU.

Add Some New Stimulation

When you have learned what you can do by hand, it’s time to bring in toys to help! There are so many different types of toys and they are experts at stimulating anything you desire. But at the top of the mountain, we have vibration.

Vibrators can be used by anyone, anywhere. These powerful stimulation devices help encourage blood flow and awaken the erogenous zones they touch. Beyond that, if you have a hard time becoming aroused - vibrators can help! Adding some power to your stimulation helps you better discover what you enjoy and where you enjoy it. It’s easiest to find our voice in the bedroom when we are well-versed in what we want!

Try Some of These Powerful Vibes!

For external, pinpointed vibration try a bullet vibrator. These small powerhouses can easily navigate your body externally and provide powerful and direct vibrations sure to please you. They can also be used with partners by slipping them into a harness or running them over your partner’s genitals!

Grinders are great for hands-free pleasure. Grinding is often one of the first ways we relieve our desires during self-exploration and that doesn’t have to stop now! These body-safe grinders can be placed on a pillow, a bed, or anywhere you desire. Simply sit down on top of them and grind however feels best.

If you want to add some relaxation to your self-pleasure, try a wand vibrator! These are powerful and can be used anywhere on the body, including sore muscles! Use this solo anywhere you want and allow yourself to relax into masturbation. They are much better for direct contact on a wider area of skin than smaller bullets are.

Looking for internal vibration? Rabbit vibrators are perfect for dual stimulation and provide both internal and external pleasure simultaneously (or independently if you desire).

Whatever venue of vibration you decide, make sure to go slow and use lots of lube! It’s all about relaxing and enjoying your self-care to the best of your ability.

Finding Your Voice

The more we try new toys and sensations the more we can find our voice in the bedroom. Advocating for your pleasure is essential to your sexual well-being and the only way we learn is through practice!

It’s also much easier for us to focus on sensations when we are alone versus with a partner. Solo play helps to turn off the internal to-do list, our worries over performance (or our facial reactions to pleasure!), and other things that can deter our relaxation and pleasure.

This exploration is not only fun but something you deserve! Grab a toy, some lube, and set the scene next time you’re feeling like masturbating. It’s always the right time to explore yourself!